61% of Americans diss the U.S. Constitution

Oh dear.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh DEAR.  Did you read, my servants, the devastating news out of America’s heartland?  No, not the tornadoes that killed hundreds and destroyed many more lives.  I’m talking about the Gallup survey published today that says 61% of American adults–including some who describe themselves as “pro-choice”–say abortion should be illegal in all or most circumstances.

Oh dear!

Can I be honest for a moment, my dear servants?  Very few news items bother me, I mean truly bother me.  But the right to abortion is one of my hot-buttons.  Touch it and I get testy.  Push hard and I can get downright nasty.

I’ve labored tirelessly for decades now to convince people that already-born women have a right to control their own bodies.  “Get your legislation off my body!” I taught generations of already-born women and their irresponsible, no-good menfolk to mindlessly chant. 

I even got the already-born woman’s right to control her body enshrined in the American Constitution as a bedrock right, a fundamental human right along with life (of the already born), liberty (of the already born) and the pursuit of selfish happiness (of the already born).

Tell me, my servants, is it possible that 61% of American adults could believe that the right to freedom of speech should be illegal in all or most circumstances? 

Is it conceivable that 61% of American adults could be convinced that the right to a speedy and public trial should be illegal in all or most circumstances?

Can you even imagine that 61% of American adults could be persuaded that the right to keep and bear arms . . . well, maybe not that one, but you get my point, yes?

This is serious, my servant friends.   The Gallup survey results, reported at cnsnews.com, were based on questions to 1,018 American adults, only 45% of whom identified as pro-life.

Did you read that correctly, my friends?  In a survey of over 1000 American adults, of which only 45% are pro-life, 61% said that abortion should be legal only under certain circumstances.

Arghhhhh!

Blechhhh!

Hold your noses, my servants; it gets worse.  About 71% of respondents said they thought abortion should be illegal in at least some cases (22% said it should be illegal in all circumstances!).

Clearly, we have work to do my servants.  We must educate the adult population in America on Constitutional principles and the rule of law. 

If it’s legal it’s right, right?  And if it’s in the Constitution, it’s a human right, right?

Right.

You Americans are going soft on me.  New technology that detects heartbeats within days of conception, that shows images of hands and feet that make a blob look human, that permits viability earlier and earlier–these contraptions must be turning you Americans into religious fanatics.

But just remember: in America, no amount of technology or religious fanaticism can change a fundamental legal right.  And abortion is a fundamental, legal, Constitutional right.

For now.

Which is what worries me.

But I take heart in one Elizabeth G.’s comment to the cnsnews.com story.  My gal Liz stood up for me, although she scared me at first with this pronouncement:

There is NO DEBATE on the fact that life begins at conception. It is already empirical.

But then she set me at ease with some sophistry about other products of conception like “the placenta and umbilical cord and a whole bunch of pieces of parts that aren’t ‘persons’,” which led to this closing flash of brilliance:

And it isn’t murder. To be murder, it would have to be illegal.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

So it is life, and it is human, but it’s not murder to kill the “person” (him or her) because it’s legal to do so!

How convenient!

And that, my servants, is why abortion must remain legal.

If only I could make it legal to kill everyone.  My work on earth would be done!

5 Responses to “61% of Americans diss the U.S. Constitution”

  1. You may hold on to Elizabeth G.’s flimsy attempts to maintain a neutral stance on abortion (since she’s clearly on the verge of succumbing to “our” side — whether she realizes it or not), but know that your lies and irrelevant data about nascent human life will not last long! The tide is turning! I never say such trite and adolescent things, but … “Suck it, Satan!” (I LOVE insulting you via the form of personal address … I just can’t help myself. I am so happy you got your own blog!)

  2. Bob Roberts Says:

    Incorrect – it is indeed against the law to kill a fetus in the womb.

    Just ask Scott Peterson.

    http://www.nndb.com/people/468/000026390/

    He killed his pregnant wife and was convicted of two murders – hers as well as the murder of the unborn fetus she carried.

    So while the courts are not surprisingly a bit behind, there is indeed solid precedent established that killing a fetus in the womb is murder.

  3. Bob Roberts Says:

    Oh, and I forgot to mention you’re lying (not suprising, considering who, in your delusional state, you are pretending to be).

    There is not a single word in the Constitution establishing abortion as any sort of right. The link between abortion and the Constitution was established on the most ridiculous and tenuous grounds and will likely fall sooner rather than later.

    In both of the primary cases used to establish this link, the women involved have come out firmly on the side of PRO LIFE, not pro murder of the unborn.

    I’d tell you to go to hell, but you’re already there.

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