Do My Liberals Really Care About Displeasing the Church?

Communion.

This is devilishly delicious, my servants.  Do you know what is one of the greatest signs of my will on earth?  It’s when Godless (but not godless) liberals try to jump on God’s side when it’s convenient for them to do so.  And because liberals are artless when it comes to feigning spirituality, they always embarrass themselves, which should teach them a lesson.

Remember, I am Liberal One.  I have perfected my ability to artfully lie, deceive and dissimulate on spiritual matters and take entire swaths of the population with me.  I try to get my peeps to emulate me, but sometimes they just intellectually soil themselves. 

I must admit — sometimes when this happens it does make me smile.

So let me share with you what made me smile today.  Tipped off by the Creative Minority Report, I linked via DevilNet to the DailyKos blog, a popular US blog run by a guy named Markos Moulitsas, who goes by “Kos”. 

Ol’ Kos believes himself to be Liberal One.  I let him believe that.  Someday he, like everyone, will know the truth.

Ol’ Kos’ blog post entitled, “Will Catholic bishops deny John Boehner communion?” immediately caught my attention because I had never known Ol’ Kos to care what the Catholic Church had to say on anything, except, perhaps, to denigrate it. 

It appears Ol’ Kos “got religion” all sudden like.

In fact, upon closer inspection, I’m pleased to tell you that Ol’ Kos didn’t switch religions to the God-believing, God-honoring type.  He’s still my same old dupe. 

What has Ol’ Kos all worked up is that duly elected US Representative John Boehner persuaded other duly elected public officials to vote on the US’ recent “debt deal” in a way that displeases Ol’ Kos.  Ol’ Kos, who hates to be displeased deemed that  “John Boehner, Catholic, is displeasing the US Conference of Catholic Bishops.”

Really?

But Ol’ Kos cares what Catholics believe?

Why?

Yes, that’s exactly what I asked: why?

It seems that Ol’ Kos has “got religion” over the US Conference of Catholic Bishops’ (USCCB) foray into politics in the budget debate.  The predictably un-Biblical US Conference of Liberal Catholic Bishops believes that a “just framework for future budgets blah blah blah blah liberal talking points blah blah blah more liberal talking points blah blah blah . . .”

And, of course, Kos, who subscribes to the religion of “blah blah,” latched on to that pronouncement to exhibit his righteous indignation by posing the stupid question: “Given [Boehner’s] ignoring the church on this matter, will he be denied communion?”

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Sorry, my servants.  Give me just a second.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Even I have to admit that this sort of blatant, blind stupidity must be called out.  Yes, I like my bud Ol’ Kos.  Yes, I even like my buds at the USCLCB.

But this is just too beautifully asinine.

As the folks at Creative Minority Report put it:

Isn’t it funny how lefties like Moulitsas ignore actual Church doctrine but transform the liberal rantings of a few at the USCCB into infallible dogma?

Yes, yes it is.  That’s why my uncontrollable laughter a moment ago.

Hey, Ol’ Kos my bud, what if, theoretically, a member of the US Congress voted consistently pro-abortion?  What would you say about that hypothetical person’s right to communion?

No, really, what would you say?

Ha ha ha ha ha.

I’m going to forward this to ten of my friends.