Dutch treat; the dikes are broken.

De cirkel is rond.

Well, I needed some good news.  No, not that Good News, my servants, but my kind of good news.  And I got it today.  I’ll tell you what it is in a moment.  But first a quiz: Do you know where the American Pilgrims–those Godpunks who in 1617 landed at Plymouth Rock in the New World–came from?

Think.

No, not England.

Right!  Holland!  Yes, those grim Pilgrims indeed started in Grimsby, Lincolnshire, but eventually found refuge in Amsterdam, the Dutch being early adopters of religious freedom.

But by 1617 the struggling group decided to pack it up and ditch Holland not for old England but for New England.

And the rest is history, as they say.

Unless . . . well, yes, it appears the rest might be not history, but mystory after all!

Why do I say this?  Well, the BBC reported the most wonderful news today in an article entitled, “Dutch rethink Christianity for a doubtful world.”

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Hey, Dutch Boy, it was always a doubtful world.  Don’t act like the world has changed.  It is you who has changed, and I’m the one who changed you.

For one, you believed my lies about the Bible, and stopped believing it was the word of God.  How do I know?  Well, consider some unbelievably heretical quotes from the BBC’s article. For starters, consider a dude named Mr. Hendrikse who dresses like a cleric and “presides” over a little “church” in central Holland.  But rather than preach from the Bible, Mr. Heretikse preaches the wisdom of man, saying:

Make the most of life on earth, because it will probably be the only one you get.

How, you ask, could any clergy blurt any such claptrap?  It’s easy when the “clergy” have abandoned truth for my lies.  Mr. Hendrikse?  He doesn’t even believe “that God exists at all as a supernatural thing.”

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Hey, Mr. Hendrikse, why do you bother?

Really, why do you bother to wake up in the morning?  If you are right, then all is futile.  You are nothing more than an odd conglomeration of matter.  Why should any other conglomeration of matter listen to you?

But Mr. Hendrikse does wake up, my servants and he does speak, and others do listen.  And they listen to him spout stupid thoughts.  How do I know?  Because he wrote a book with a stupid title: “Believing in a Non-Existent God.”

And apparently he’s surrounded by hopelessly confused, lazy, stupid thinkers as well.  When some “more traditionalist Christians” objected to his heresy,

. . . a special church meeting decided his views were too widely shared among church thinkers for him to be singled out.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Hey, never mind that I’ve won as soon as groups who don’t believe in God can be classified as “Christians,” just not the “more traditional” type.  Never mind that I’ve won as soon as a “meeting” can “decide” right doctrine based on the number of people believing it.  Never mind it all, my servants, just know that I’m winning on all fronts in Holland; someone let their finger out of the dike.

I’m winning, folks.

Orthodoxy by popularity.  I love it.

Hey, if enough people believe a lie, is it still a lie?

Ha ha ha ha ha.

According to some lie-believer named Wim De Jong, Mr. Heretikse’s beliefs are okey dokey because:

Here you can believe what you want to think for yourself, what you really feel and believe is true.

Yes, and if you really feel it enough and believe it enough, it magically becomes true, right?

Hey, Mr. Lie-Belcher, if God does exist, does he cease to exist because Mr. Wimsy De Jong really feels he doesn’t exist?

Oh, I love to see my servants’ illogical, darkened thinking.  It is really a badge of honor for me, and a stinging indictment of all true Christians in Holland.

The “churches” in Holland are “experimenting with the contents of the gospel” according to the BBC article because “traditional Christianity places God in too restricted a box.”  And by getting God out of his “box” the “churches” in Amsterdam believe they will attract more people.

And, I must admit, I hope they do!

I never thought I would say that about the Dutch.

And the beat goes on.

4 Responses to “Dutch treat; the dikes are broken.”

  1. Dear Devil,

    Allow me to say that this is one of the best post I read from you.
    It is you at your finest.

    I love it. I think I will talk about your post in my blog.

    Best,
    Pedro Erik

  2. Besides that, reading your post, I remembered the “dictatorship of relativism” defined by Pope Benedict XVI.

  3. Merlin the Exorcist Says:

    Foemeanists should not have acted like crybabies telling the government to inhumanely jail men who compliment their breasts,cleavage and rears.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: