Allow Me to Introduce Myself…

I am Temptress.

Mmmmm.

It feels wonderful to be here.

I am usually much more sneaky and quiet and behind the scenes, so this is unusual for me to make a more public appearance on my Master’s blog.

My name is Temptress.

And it is your privilege to learn more about me so that you can be on guard against those “believers in the true God” who fight against me in search of humility, acceptance of suffering, selflessness…. Ugh, nevermind… Typing those words hurts my long fingernails and you can go look up that stuff in that despicable book, the Bible (if you have the stomach for it.  I don’t.)

You see, I am a demon of beauty, influence, and power, and I offer you your heart’s desires on earth: the ones that will cause you to accidentally fall in luck with my Master so that you become his servant and ultimately live with us in hell.  I made my decision long ago, to follow that attractive “angel of light”, and it was only after he dragged me into the netherworld that I saw what was truly waiting for me.  My goal is to bring as many humans as possible down to hell to join us, and I have been quite successful. In fact, since we demons hate each other and are always competing, I may as well point out that I believe I am the MOST successssssful.

Well… ahem… outside of my Master himself.

The thing is, my little babes, I care for you.  I appear beautiful and even motherly to you.   I want you to gratify yourself, to find the greatest earthly pleasures, to take your mind off your pain in many creative ways (not prayer!!!)…

Let me ease your pain…

I am Temptress,

and I look forward to helping you.

132 Responses to “Allow Me to Introduce Myself…”

  1. 😈 Go, Temptress, go! 😀

    • Thank you for your warm… or should I say HOT welcome JMJ. Hope to see you back here many timessssssss…..

      • I’ve learned nothing from the tales of Eden, Icarus, Babel, Gomorrah. I run with scissors, play with matches, drink soda with Pop Rocks and will vote for Romney.

        So keep me on your dance card, you Devilish Devilblogging Debutante.

  2. Javon Johnston Says:

    Temptress, what is it like working for Satan?

    • Well, very… tempting. The more I work for him, the more powerful I feel, even though I will never be the actual Master… and that in itself (if you promise to not tell him) is horrible.

  3. Javon Johnston Says:

    Dear Temptress,

    If you can, get your Master to give me an invisibility cloak.

    Sincerely,

    Javon Johnston

    • Things are not always as they appear. And you do not see the price tag until after the transaction.

      • My dear Piltdown Superman,

        Shhhhhhhh…..😉

        Temptress

      • Ahhh, truth! I hate the truth. Fortunately, so do most humans. And you should see the looks when they see the price tag!.

      • Javon Johnston Says:

        Okay

      • Thanks a lot, Piltdown Superman.

        It was just innocent curiousity that had me toddle over to your eponymous website. So, from page-one no less, why did you subject me to such well argued, citation heavy facts and references that I now have to look afresh at some of what I know I knew after 25+ years of formal education?

        And where will the time come from? Like I don’t already have too much to read. Sheesh! There goes my leisurely, long weekend. Hope you’re pleased with yourself.

        Thanks again! 😦

        —JMJ

        • I do have that effect on people…

        • Yeah? Well, I’m gonna tell on you….. 😛
          👿 TEMPTRESS👿, Piltdown Superman is unapologetically spreading thoughts and ideas that fly directly in the face of well-established teachings and rigorously tested theories that you and your master espouse.

          He unabashedly uses the fact that Humans’ scientific edifices are replete with the failings, errors and inconsistencies that can occur when cosmically-young minds grapple with knowing the Infinite . You know, the old baby-and-bathwater thingy. I mean, he actually seems to be decrying use of Humanity’s free will simply because it sometimes leads to conclusions he finds suspect or downright wrong.

          I would try to dissuade him from his passionately thoughtful but mistaken search for Truth by pointing out the fact that, in order to proselytize his un-satanly views, he uses the fruits of the same scientifically applied free will. Sure, He could have but, on the Sixth Day, God did not end with, “Let there be the WorldWide Web.” He threw Wo/Man into the Cosmos/Chaos filled with all the building blocks one could ever hope for and told us, “Make something good.” Among many other things, you got a-bombs and blogs.

          I would try to dissuade him myself but, for now, he is much better prepared than I.

          So, having had eons* more time to prepare, are you and your master going to let this stand after all the mileage you’ve gained from steering that free will?

          Please straighten out this Troublemaker a.s.a.s.p.** If he has his way, then, with blinders firmly fastened, Humanity would be marching in lockstep into what he calls “The Light”.

          How would that look on your resume?

          —JMJ

          * years X 10^9
          **as soon as satanically possible

        • Yes, Piltdown Superman is a troublemaker for sure. Like light in darkness, his words bring truth to my lies. My main advantage is that God comes with truth, and this causes most men to reject truth in spite of the evidence. Lucky me! (And I like asasp! Mind if I use it?)

        • Of course you may use it, devilblogger…. for a licensing fee: One tormented Soul released for each use. Volume licensing available.

        • JMJ, I am grateful (in a devilish way) for your advice on Piltdown Superman. I will avoid clicking on his blog at all costs. After my Master’s depressing post from this morning, I don’t think I can handle anymore ‘truth’ for today.

          My Master, I see that you are already aware of threats like the fellow I just mentioned. I will be sure to look for his weaknesses… I am sure he has them… hm hm hm hm😉

        • Nice. Succinct and very cool.

        • “Piltdown Superman is unapologetically spreading thoughts and ideas that fly directly in the face of well-established teachings and rigorously tested theories that you and your master espouse. ”

          You say that like it’s undesirable to you.

          “If he has his way, then, with blinders firmly fastened, Humanity would be marching in lockstep into what he calls “The Light”. ”

          Did you notice that I am coming up on my five year anniversary at my other Weblog, “Stormbringer’s Thunder”? Not only exposing fallacies of the cult of evolutionism, but the glaring lack of logic and rational thinking among your dark lord’s most enthusiastic minions, the so-called “New Atheists”. To quote him, “Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha”. You know, the alleged “freethinkers”, who claim that their master does not exist, and are infuriated when I dare to suggest that atheism, with all of its anger, narcissism and selfishness, is possibly a form of Satanism. They seek to destroy me. Again, I quote your dark lord for my own devices: “Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha”.

        • Yes, “free thinkers” is one of my greatest shams. Free thinkers are only free to think atheistic thoughts. And evolutionism? My greatest lie of all because it (supposedely) removes the need for a creator. And my second greatest lie? To get lots of Christians to believe that evolutionism can be compatible with Biblical truth. Even Piltdown Superman cannot stop that one. At least, I hope he can’t. Hmmmmm… can he??

        • <>”You say that like it’s undesirable to you.”<>
          — On the contrary,I relish and welcome intelligent, fact-based discussions especially when they are based on a rigorous scientific methodology. If the facts at issue differ from mine, then I take that as an opportunity to learn. If the new “facts” conform to the truth, then I incorporate them; if they do not, then, with a breath of comfort, I simply blow them away. No rancor, no loss of sleep.
          <>”Did you notice that I am coming up on my five year anniversary at my other Weblog, “Stormbringer’s Thunder”? “<>

          No, I didn’t. Happy Anniversary! My sincere congratulations tho’ I’ve yet to take the time to meticulously pore over your site(s).

          <> “…. your dark lord’s….”<>
          CAREFULLY read anything/everything I’ve written and you’ll quickly correct that possessive pronoun! Even in fun places like this, I NEVER toy with that kind of danger. Thoughts and words are powerful things and I carefully guard mine even while “at play”.

          <>”…when I dare to suggest that atheism, with all of its anger, narcissism and selfishness, is possibly a form of Satanism.”<>

          I’m not blowing happy smoke when I sat that, person who passionately espouses his carefully considered views and STILL uses words like “suggest” and “possibly” when gainsaying the views of others, in my opinion, is a person worthy of my careful attention.

          <>”They seek to destroy me.”<>
          Nope. Not I. Again, tho’ I’ve not made studying your opinions a high priority, even my cursory glance at PiltdownSuperman.com makes me know that you are serious, studied and argue with facts. I don’t burn books, would never execute a “heretic” and have been mistaken in my “facts” so often that, even while I’m pounding the table to drive home my points, I try very hard to listen.

          On a personal note: The VERY first book I ever bought was from a musty, storefront bookshop when I was three-or-four. Of course Mom/Accountant handled the bill but it was I who proudly left the shop with Ann Terry White’s, “All About Archaeology” firmly tucked under my arm. Years later, I actually followed Don Johanson’s flamboyant escapades at Hadar and, on summer vacation while visiting a college professor at her family’s home in Tanzania, visted the site of Richard Leakey’s first date with Lucy.

          So, Piltdown Superman, not only don’t I want to destroy you, I look forward to learning what you think is true.

          —JMJ

        • “Even Piltdown Superman cannot stop that one.”

          Actually, *I* cannot. Not alone, and in my own strength. But just one man can make a ripple, in addition to others who make ripples, as well as organizations.

          Watch for the next “Question Evolution Day” on February 12, when true freethinkers make ourselves heard.

          Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

          (I see why you do that, it’s fun!)

        • JMJ, I have been extremely reluctant to be too straightforward and cause anyone to break character, but I feel I must say that I have been having a great time reading your responses to me and my work. Also, for a point of clarification, I was not referring to you as someone who wants to destroy me. It was not you who offered my name and location to a threatening person, nor was it you who told me to commit suicide. I never considered anything you said to be threatening.

          “CAREFULLY read anything/everything I’ve written and you’ll quickly correct that possessive pronoun! Even in fun places like this, I NEVER toy with that kind of danger. Thoughts and words are powerful things and I carefully guard mine even while “at play”.”

          My apologies for being too hasty and enthusiastic. You are quite right in that!

        • Thank you but I was not in any way offended.

          Sorry you experienced a not-so-kind person. If I thought you would consider it, I’d suggest we get together and throw him a good, old fashioned, “Homo sapiens neanderthalensis” beatdown. 😎😎

    • My dear Javon, you seem like a wonderful person in my…er… devilbloggger’s kingdom. I want to help… May I ask why you want an invisibility cloak?

      I accidentally chuckled when I heard that. Star Trek came to mind. Klingons.

      Yours truly,
      Temptress

  4. mazsamem Says:

    Greetings, Temptress. I look forward to many exchanges with you. You’ve been on my mind since devilblogger announced your impending appearance. I’ve come to the decision that you’re “hell in heels”. After reading your introduction, I think that’s a fair assssessssment? You’ll surely put a different (feminine) ssspin on the many thingssss we dissscussss here. O, it seems you’ve influenced me yet again, and so quickly! Being a she-demon, you’re aware of my 2 months in speech class for mispronunciation of letter S? Looking forward to your “motherly” attention, Temptress. And a note to JaVon…beware of whose cookie jar you’re sticking your hand in. The…umm…lady just got here. And already you want an invisibility cloak? See what you’re in for, o mother not divine? I’d extend my roughened, short-nailed hand in welcome if I didn’t fear you’d grab hold and never let go. Nevertheless, wecome o Temptress! BTW who does your hair? 😉

    • Dear Mazsamem,

      I love the way you pronouse ‘ssssss’…

      But you make me nervous. I am detecting real motherly care in your words, as well as real lov… um, nevermind. But I am quite sure I don’t trust you yet. Already, right when I make my debu, you try to stear Javon away from me. Why won’t you extend your hand to me in reality? Have you been influenced by the true God? If so, I don’t know if I can impart my hair advice to you…😉

      Thank you for your welcome, and I look forward to disproving your comments as well as wiping that compassionate, truly caring, truly motherly smile from your face. Your real joy makes me sick to the stomach.

      (Friends, women like mazsamem are very threatening… beware!)

      With caution,
      Temptress

      • A good speech pathologist friend of mine can help you and my dear mazsamem to cure those lingual-protrusion lisps, something I think you really should do. Afterall, we don’t want to confuse you with our male homosexual friends, now do we?

        Yeah, yeah, I know! But, since none of my gay friends is likely to read this and I know DB’s loyal readers won’t rat me out, who cares? 8)

        • mazsamem Says:

          Ahhh, thank you for the advice. Never a listhper…ahem. Just a hissser like our our Temptress–you catch on fast, cherie amour. 🙂 Yet how could anyone confuse me…me of all people…of maleness? OK, ok..the husky voice, the smoke dangling from the corner of my mouth, the lack of being properly made-up at times (MOSTLY always to be honest) and serious lack of fashion magazines in my personal library–on these I stand convicted. As for Temptress, she must speak for herself. And I’m sure she will. 😉

        • No, no, My Dear Mazsamem! There is NO-thing about you that I find remotely masculine. However, we know that the Collector of Lost Souls will use every means available in serive of her misguided master, including temptations of the Adam&Eve, Adam&Adam and Eve&Eve variety, the fact that they would fail with you notwithstanding.

          Now, I must confess 😳 , that since that first😉 I’ve had my e-binoculars* trained on you and have seen nothing but “Eve”. However, that does not mean our Temptress frenemy would not try the old apple trick, anyway.

          Re:-
          1. Husky voice: Sarah Vaughn, Billie Holliday, Janis Joplin. What’s the problem?
          2. Smoke dangling: Only puffing for want of puckering. Easy one.
          3. Made up: Is often, but not always, just that: Made up. ‘Sides, with reference to #2, you’d only have to reapply it, anyway.😉
          4. Fashion magazines: Mostly peppered with photos of near- anorexic women who seem to have been selected by men who don’t really like Women. Clotheshangers. Botticelli and Rodin had it right.

          I would go on but I need both hands to take my other foot out of my mouth.

          — JMJ

          * Are the Venetian blinds really necessary?

      • mazsamem Says:

        Ahhh, dear Temptress. You seem to have a devilishly good grasp at soul reading. And (sin of pride) I’m actually honored that you don’t feel you can trust me yet. Must it always remain that way, o Temptress? Sorry that you feel a need to warn others that I might pose a threat to them. Me, a mere Christian. Hmmm…there MUST be power in the Blood!

        • Ah, dear Mazsamem, you have an angellicly good grasp at being my antithesis… you offer true care and concern and beauty (as well as humor) whereas I merely APPEAR that way. Only I think my appearance, because I am cunning and bound to lead soulas to my Master for eternity, could be more powerful… I only hope my seductive outreach will drown out your trulu loving tones… This shall be a challenge!

          OH! And I am still writhing on the ground about your mention of ‘the blood”… would you kindly not use that language here? AAAgghh!!! No need to be so mean to me when I am so new on this blog…

          Please, just let me gain a few more souls, or my Master will not be pleased and I am in servitude to him… Out of care and concern for them, of course… hm hm hm hmmmmm!!!!!

        • I am surprised that I am even allowed to comment here. Evolutionism is a temptation, man making himself the Creator, and my job is to expose both the theological and scientific fallacies of that philosophy. Religion, in fact. Even for New Age ideals. What do the beings from Arcturus, when channeled, say? “We are more highly evolved, and we’re here to help you humans evolve as well. Drop that Jesus is the only way stuff.” I think my work is a great enemy of yours.

    • Oh, mazsamem, How girly-girl can you get? 😛 Thought everyone knew that😈 Temptress’😈 tresses are tenderly tended to by the tonsorially timeless Madame Medusa… of Teaneck.

      Not sure who does her makeup and talons but I do know she wears Prada, calls her car “Christine” and, when actually seen, is usually In a Blue Dress.

      BTW👿 Temptress👿 has a ravenous appetitie (mostly for Soul food) and scoffs “Devil Dogs” between meals but she maintains her wickedly sinful figure and GloWinG complexion by doing a daily two-hours of Pontius Pilates followed by thirty minutes in the Ultimate Steam Room. So, unless you have that kind of time to burn AND dine with a l-o-n-g handled spoon, I would not advise trading beauty secrets with😈 Temptress😈 over lunch.

      If you go ahead anyway :roll : at least remember this: DO NOT order any desserts such as pie, brown Betty, turnover, tart, strudel that are made with apples. 👿 Temptress 👿 + apples has been known to cause a horrible burning sensation… even with the girls. I mean, we all know that she, Jessica Simpson and Brittney Spears are really “just” friends, right?

      Pardon my intruding into your “girl talk”. I’m just sayin’….

      • mazsamem Says:

        O, JMJ~Wahahaha. How good to hear from you again! The tail of the tresses of the Temptress STILL has my tangue all tongled up. See?! 🙂 You intentionally caused repeated bouts of laughter & I needed your prescription. Your humor is rX-tremely addictive…so when can I get my next fix? 😉 No need to pardon you for intruding on my feeble attempt at “girl talk”. You’re always welcome to any conversation. “Pontius Pilates”. Rich? Priceless! 🙂🙂🙂

      • JMJ, you seem to know a frightening amount of facts about me. You are giving away all my secrets! But you forgot Lynnsey Lohan and Paris Hilton. 😉

        • Boy, do I owe Ms. Jessica Simpson an HUGE apology! I meant to include Paris Hilton rather than comely Jessica in my slanderous diatribe.

          I’ll be lucky if she or mazsamem ever speak to me again!

  5. You sound awesome =)

  6. Tempress, you remember me the Rolling Stones song (Sympathy to the Devil). It seems that you are a “woman of wealth and taste”.

    Welcome.

  7. follow me into darkness Says:

    oh temtptress! my heart has no desires on this earth(maybe a few, im a man after all) touch my heart and you shall see them. rally enough souls such as mine and your “master” may find himself swimming in that lake of fire a bit early…

    • Follow me into the darknesssss… I am smitten, absolutely SMITTEN with your name. I love to say that to my followers… Only I detect a slight contradiction and a possiblity that you are not one of my Master’s true followers. Unless you are excited to join us in that lake of fire, that is.

      Either way, I am sure there is SOME desire you have. Hm hm hm hm….

      • follow me into darkness Says:

        me? contradictory? potato, pototo? no my temptress, not i. did you do as i asked and touch my heart? there you shall find your answer. as to the matter of your master: the youthful and ambitious will usurp the old and infirm. 2000 some odd years on, and father is still beating the same dead horse. are you not bored out your diabolical mind? theres a new kid in town/ i don’t wanna hear it! your presence quickens me, dark mistress. don’t be TOO smitten with my name, as i change it frequently. despair not my queen, you’ll know when i’m here. p.s. is that picture your true visage? shes quite beautiful, yes? i’m sure your true face is even more awe-inspiring. no need to put on airs for me, your most faithful prison-born.

      • iam become your 1 true scapegoat Says:

        dear temptress, the welcome message is feeling quite lonely. whilst you are roaming, do drop in and have a look. have your “master” follow you as well. could be that i left something there for him…something that begs for attention…

        • Hello, my dear iam become your 1 true scapegoat… (do you have a nickname that’s quicker to type? ;)) I think I may have missed your welcome message. All that soul seduction can leave me with little time… please do clue me in!

          Ah and my Master… I think he does follow me (around)… that is why I must always appear busy seducing souls…

          Your,
          temptress

  8. shalimamma Says:

    Oooooh, Temptress, I shouldn’t admit this in public, but you are scaring me… It has been rather easy (sort of) to argue with a male devil. But women are much more conniving. Thankfully, mazsamem and JMJ have provided a significant amount of humor and I am still laughing! (Which of course, cancels out any of your effects or devilblogggers’ since you all both hate joy and humor, in reality.)

    Piltdown Superman, you make an excellent point! Kind of exposes the whole truth about satan, huh? Keep up the good work! 😉

    • shalimamma, you should be scared. Why don’t you join me? It can’t be very fun to be laden with all those children when you could be so great in the world. I have read your blog, and I think you could have so much better in this world. You are far beyond dishes, toilet scrubbing, and diaper changing… and why do you stick with one man? What did he do to deserve you? I hope you will talk to me more… you have potential for my Maser’s kingdom…

      • prison born Says:

        for shame! trying to tempt shalimamma? you do know your mothering me, don’t you? oh, and im starting to reap the rewards, dearest anti-mother. not to brag, but i’m starting to get pretty cut up. i’d swear my bones are even growing! my favorite shirts are too tight, and i can’t button any of my pants. 26 may be too old for a growth spurt. must be anti-mothers milk! you do no i only take, right? no giving, only taking. and i will NEVER stop.

        • <>
          “my favorite shirts are too tight, and i can’t button any of my pants. 26 may be too old for a growth spurt. must be anti-mothers milk! ”
          <>

          Twenty-six you say? Yes, much too old for a grwoth spurt and far too young for middle-age spread. Hmm? Sounds like man-opause, to me.

  9. Javon Johnston Says:

    How can I get my superpowers?!

    • Prison Born Says:

      i’ll give you powers friend. first, i need blood. lots of blood. procure it any way you like type is of no concern. secondly the ritual must be tailored to whatever specific powers you seek. lastly, you must end your mortal life. you didn’t think it was going to be easy did you? no mere mortal can possess powers they weren’t gifted with at birth without becoming something else first. life is a gift no matter how fragile it is, so if you’re ready to pawn off your humanity then step into my office…

      • Hey there, Prison Born. Speech is so innately human that we tend to take it and its power for granted. We acquire the skill so early in life that it seems to be a given and we innocently assume that others speak the same language. Often, the sound is the same but the meaning (what is heard by the listener) is radically different from what we intended.

        Did you know that “gift” is the German word for “poison”?

        Take care with your words. Your listeners may be in a ‘place’ where they hear something dangerously different from what you intended.

        BTW, through hard work, introspection, meditation/prayer, study and will can’t we acquire more than what we started with?

        Ciao.

        —JMJ

        • Prison Born Says:

          hello good sir! let me see, hard work is…hard. introspection can be depressing and lead to more desperation. meditaion is quite boring. prayer yields only silence. but studies- yes! studies can help you aquire new knowledge. well, new to you knowledge at least. knowledge can gift you with a great deal, if wielded properly. i take your meaning about picking one words carefully but… these “forces” aren’t seeking HIS business, HE is seeking THEIR services. just thought knowledge of the risks involved could perhaps prove discouraging.

        • “Sir”? Maybe. But, “Good”?! 😕

          — I, too, hate hard work…. but not as much as I hate poverty.
          — If introspection leads to depression then its time to work on what one sees.
          — Doing meditation can be boring, I guess. But being in meditation never is.
          — True ‘prayer’ never results in silence once we learn to be still and to hear. There’s a lot of Truth to be found in silence. Maybe not what we expect or want to find, and certainly not at the volume we’ve become used to, but, when Your Spirit ‘prays’, that Silence becomes a beautiful Cosmic fugue.

          I hope our bud, Javon Johnston, decides to chime in.

          Ciao for now, Prison Born.

          —JMJ

      • Javon Johnston Says:

        Forget about it! The Law of Attraction is better!

  10. Javon Johnston Says:

    So, how can I get my heart’s desires you talked about in this post?

    • What is it that you really, truly want, Javon Johnston?

      — JMJ

      • iam become your 1 true scapegoat Says:

        he wants what we all want: attention. you want a clear-cut way to have superpowers, mr. johnston? heres what you do:

        1.watch superhero movies for hours- i mean all day really tire yourself out.

        2. go to bed! yours dreams are almost sure to give you your “hearts desires” after hours of carefully guided stimulation.

        ahh, the joy of simplicity !

        • @ iam become…: Most Folk do not want attention so badly that, in order to get it, they would make crass and lewd suggestions to a person who might seriously be seeking power… maybe to deal with troubling situations. They especially would not if there was the *slightest* possibility they were addressing a Young Person.

          Ahh! The joy of simply caring. 😉

          —JMJ

        • Scapegoat, Prison Born, et al:

          Please excuse me and accept my apologies. After being guided by mazsamem, it’s clear that I COMPLETELY misunderstood your words to the “lad”.

          I’m sorry.

          — JMJ

      • Javon Johnston Says:

        I want invisibility, and telekinesis.

        • Yeah, Javon Johnston, those would be good to have, way better than the laser-eyes I imagined for myself when I was about 11-12 years old. I imagined that my superpower could make anything I didn’t like disappear but only if I looked at a red light first. Kinda lame, huh? 😕 Hey, about how old are you?

          I know what they can do but exactly how would you use your powers?

          —JMJ

        • Javon Johnston Says:

          I am young boy and I would use my powers to have fun, cause a little mischief, and to aid in stalking girls.

        • I have the ability to make cats nervous.

        • mazsamem Says:

          Javon, may I ask “how young is young”? Sometimes I think you might be a young one, other times make me wonder. Therefore, you already HAVE at least one superpower…that of seeming wise beyond your years. 🙂 Stalking girls…beware. JMJ is a super ninja. AND he also has e-binoculars. That’s why I keep my venetian blinds drawn, JMJ. 😉

        • Jvon Johnston Says:

          Young enough.

    • My dear Javon, are you referring to your true desires that were there when you were born? Or the ones that my Master and I have inspired?

      • Javon Johnston Says:

        I’ve been wanting superpowers since February of 2011. And those desires are my heart desires!

        • Heart desires are pretty poweful things. Good news is that a lot of times we actually get them. Bad news is that they are not always EXACTLY what we hoped for and, way too often, we have to wait a while to get them.

          You’ve been waiting a long time, huh, Javon? Pretty cool for you to be so patient. If you have to wait a bit longer, is there anything else that can make the time less of a hassle? I mean, is there anything WE can do RIGHT NOW to make what happened in February 2011 a little easier to take? Just let me know, okay?

  11. Prison Born I like your words… might I ask, are you a fellow demon? Or one of the damned humans? I hope to see much more of your comments!

    • prison born Says:

      i’ll be whatever you want or need me to be. just ask…

    • prison born Says:

      jmj, you’re not running a “grift”, now are you? you seem to be quite attached to this johnston fellow. maybe you personally know him? that last suggestion by scapegoat (yours truly) wasn’t meant to be crass, and unless your “filth filter” is more attuned than mine (its not-trust me) there was certaintly no lewdness to be found. that was a sincere attempt to help the lad find what he’s looking for.

      • scapegoat, prison born or whatever you call yourself next, stop being obtuse… euphemistically speaking. Some(young?)one is in trouble. If you can help, Help. If not, be silent and get out of the way.

        This is as much Internet face-fighting that I will do, especially with one who recognizes that he probably was addressing a “lad” and chose to do so as you did.

        — Fin —

        • Rashly, it turns out, I added this before mazsamem corrected me.

          So, once again, Scapegoat, Prison Born, et al:

          Please excuse me and accept my apologies. After being guided by mazsamem, it’s clear that I COMPLETELY misunderstood your words to the “lad”.

          I’m sorry.

          — JMJ

      • mazsamem Says:

        prison born~JMJ is really a very caring person…not the grifter type. I’ve seen Javon on here occasionally for quite awhile. Sometimes, a person, for whatever reason, feels a “pull” to make a real connection with another. I think that’s what JMJ is doing…trying to reach out, perhaps offer guidance to Javon. I went back to find the post re: crass & lewd suggestions. My feminine intuition kicked in 😉 and I believe JMJ thought you were suggesting something COMPLETELY different when you said “after hours of carefully guided stimulation”. You were referring to the first part of your answer-to watch hour after hour of super hero movies, which would then hopefully cause one to dream of actually BEING a super hero. See, guys, no rudeness from prison born intended. 🙂

        • prison born Says:

          correctomundo! very perceptive! not used to seeing jmj so…upset. whilst defending an e-son maybe he got so overzealous he forgot to read carefully.

        • Thank you, mazsamem, for straightening me out. Just goes to prove, “Reading is fundamental.” 😳

        • prison born Says:

          does moi have a defender? i suppose i need one, my mouth always gets me in trouble. but its tough work, and there is no pay!

      • Scapegoat, Prison Born, et al:

        Please excuse me and accept my apologies. After being guided by mazsamem, it’s clear that I COMPLETELY misunderstood your words to the “lad”.

        I’m sorry.

        — JMJ

        • prison born Says:

          no harm, no foul. admittedly my first statement to mr. johnston was unethical, wrong, maybe a scootch evil. but not the second one. this one sees you’re trying to potentially help someone who potentially needs guidence. this one is not suited for such endeavors and will defer that responsibility to one who professes and very likely is suited for such tasks. mentor away! i’ll refrain from comment. but i’ll be watching developments with interest…

        • mazsamem Says:

          Hello, dear JMJ! Once again, I have to thank you. The first time was for suggesting I check out Life Victorious. Now, I want to thank both you AND Piltdown Superman for the extremely interesting dialog you gents had going. Curious as a cat😉 I went and checked out Piltdown Superman’s two sites…the one about the theory of evolution, and then just recently, “Stormbringer’s Thunder”. I’m seriously, deeply impressed by both sites. I was glued to my screen while watching “180” when I clicked on that button at “Stormbringer’s Thunder . And Piltdown Superman, you mentioned that Atheism and Satanism are often one and the same. YES! My mom claimed to be an atheist, but what her beliefs were are the beliefs of many Satanists. I’m making my connections (personal brain issue🙂 ), but you’ve given me some things I need for a response to someone on THIS site. So in my roundabout way, I’m thanking both of you gentlemen for piquing (sp???) my curiosity…and then showing me the right road to take for where I need to go. So, much appreciated! 🙂

        • mazsamem, To quote Sherlock Holmes, “My blushes”. “Stormbringer’s Thunder” began almost five years ago, and about two years ago, I rededicated my life to the worst enemy of the owner of this Weblog. “SB-T” is written “in character” to inform and entertain. After that came (don’t look, people of darkness) “A Soldier for Jesus” (latest article, a review of a book by a Mr. Ablo). My creationist tendencies were rekindled, and PDSM was born. Right now, there’s a Pointer dog above the posts. I don’t do much writing there, I show people the experts. Lots of links for seekers and homeschoolers, too. If you’re on Facebook, you might want to check “The Question Evolution Project”.

          I’ve been having a great time being told off here. And now, back to our sponsors.

    • TEMPTRESS👿 , as far as charmers go, you may have met your match. I can already see you arm-in-arm with Prison Born shopping at Hades Depot for a new furnace!

      • prison born Says:

        me?! a one woman man? if i join up with temptress, my power will multiply so quickly i (or anyone else) won’t be able to manage it! thermo-nuclear devastation! being a bachelor has helped me hone my craft, and maintain my sanity. men, you see , are blunt instruments; we beat things until they give us the intended result… or they break. women, on the other hand, are sharp instruments. rather than outright force, they use cunning and finesse. i know what you’re thinking (silently protesting) not ALL men are blunt, some have finesse. indeed they do! bachelor-hood is the easiest way to tap into that ability. conversely , that old saying usually holds true: “behind every great man lies a great woman”. women have charms to sooth the savage beast…so that they may neuter him of course! i’d look awfully funny with one of those cones on my head!

  12. Javon Johnston Says:

    Is there a way that I can get superpowers without dying?

    I quote: ”You see, I am a demon of beauty, influence, and power, and I offer you your heart’s desires on earth…”.

  13. follow me into darkness Says:

    guess ill have to buy a red sports car (flames on the sides! yes!) does man-opause make one taller as well? im not kidding, im growing! if im lying, then im dying! take that to bank, deposit it, let it accrue interest, then recklessly spend it! man-opause?! shoot me when that happens! by the nine divines that sounds awful!

    • — Okay, I’ll buy cut-up, buffed-up, even the BruceBanner-to-Hulk effect you have on your shirts. BUT… the bones and height thing? C’mon! You’re either on the Garvey/Bonds One-a-Day Vitamin plan or someone sold you a funhouse mirror.

      — If you can’t put down half, then don’t max out the card just yet on the red sports car. Not at your age; ie., not unless you’re also noticing that you have more face to wash and less hair to comb each morning. Bald + Bus does not = Babes.

      We’re all dying. Trick is to live with style and grace while doing it.

      What’s the ‘nine divines’? Sounds like a huge ’50’s doo-wop group.

      —JMJ

      P.S.: Thanks for not making me eat a second helping of crow. Hate that stuff.

      • follow me into darkness Says:

        elder scrolls is a reference to oblivion. as far as my recent growth spurt goes, i have been tending to myself, doing pushups/pullups and running. but nothing extravagant and no supplements. seeing as how im constantly told i have a “babyface”, and i can’t even purchase an m-rated game (!) or an r-rated movie(!!!) without getting carded, i’m beginning to wonder if i’ve been lied to about my age.oh well, tis’ better to look young than old, i suppose! i’ve heard that us men age alot more gracefully than our female counterparts, probably due to the whole childbearing/motherhood process. i’ve also heard we have shorter lifespans. seems a fair trade-off to this one! I’AM MAN ! hear me…yawn and say “i’ll do it later”!

        p.s. its quite annoying to put on your favorite shirt and have it look like you bought it at baby gap! some of my shirts cannot be replaced. ARRGH !

        • You were being serious about that growth spurt, huh? How much taller and over how long? I’m not an M.D. but, if the changes are really significant, you should see one and make sure your endocrine system isn’t out of whack. They may pooh-pooh your concerns because of your good health and youth. MAKE them listen and test thoroughly.

          Thank your parents for the “babyface” genes and then read up on alleles. If you’re in the mood for something really outrageous re aging, check out something my Son recently shared with me: The Immortal Jellyfish.

          The disparity between women’s and men’s life expectancies in the so-called developed World is shrinking…. fast! Smoking, stress and life-style changes have taken their tolls on the distaff half of the species. SEXIST ALERT #1: It’s even argued that women’s recent ‘sexual iberation’ has had deleterious effects on their overall health. Seems that receiving too much of the stuff we contribute to procreation from too many ‘sources’ is not good for women. Who knows? Maybe just another fearful male attempt to bind their feet again.

          That men age better than women is suspect, at best; George and Barbara B., notwithstanding. Depends on Nature & Nurture: What traits they inherited and how well they take care of themselves. I had a maternal Aunt who, at the age of 76, had the body and bounce in her step of a 24 year old. Okay, she was a ballerina and danced/taught until her death at 82…. but, still.

          Motherhood and childbearing seem to be beneficial to most women’s health and longevity, at least for those women who plan for it and experience that miracle in stable, stress-reduced circumstances… you know, like in a healthy marriage. Of course, access to great pre/post-natal care makes a huge difference. SEXIST ALERT #2: For their own benefit, women should stay barefoot and pregnant. Bare feet make it easier to balance with those beautiful Mommy Mounds.

          Well, Mr. AKA, I have to go. Spent way too much time in this addictive place and I gotta go check: There must have been a power outage in my neighborhood that caused an accident in front of my house. I mean, What else could have all these women crowding around outside with torches?

          Ciao.

          — JMJ

        • mazsamem Says:

          For real, follow me…follow JMJ’s advice about getting checked out! My dad had a benign pituatary tumor. It can cause growth, among other things. Your system needs a check-up if not a tune-up, OK? Else we’re gonna be replying to he might be (a) giant. Doubt if that’s your problem, but I LIKE you being here and healthy!

      • follow me into darkness Says:

        changed my name again ! sorry shoulda mentioned that. this one has a short attention span

        • If you have an Apple “i” device, check out the Apple Store. They have an app for multiple-personality disorders. Amazon has one too, but only for large, fierce women.

  14. mazsamem Says:

    To JMJ and follow me/scapegoat (can I call ya babyface? 🙂 ) You guys are gonna tick off the Master of Disaster with your joking. BTW, I heard that men age less because they exfolliate often aka shave. So now EVERY cosmetic manufacturer tries to sell us women yet more products. Alas, I realized (not yesterday even) youth sure isn’t eternal. Hmm, wonder if I should try shaving my face…cheaper, you know? 😉 Wonder how Temptress staves off aging…never mind. Guess I already suspect! But I’m not going to change sides…so age on…:)

    • Thanks for the heads-up about DB’s possible reaction to all this tomfoolery. Actually, he welcomes this sort of silliness much as he welcomes folks’ not paying attention to their physical, mental or spiritual well-being. Our distractions make it easier for him to insinuate himself into our daily lives.

      There are many ways to ‘Keep the Beat’ so that, even as we go about living-laughing-loving, we don’t fall Out-of-Step and become easy prey to his “trying to lead” in this Dance of Life. (I just love metaphors 🙂 )

      So, mazsamem, tho’ I try never to take my eye off his machinations even when goofing around, I’ll heed your warning and be a bit less rowdy here. Getting his attention is not high on my To-Do List.

      TEMPTRESS remains gorgeous and alluring only because she has the DevilExpress Card. When viewed by our mortal standards that Card seems to have no limit. Thing is, as high as it appears to us (apparent youthfulness and beauty, for example), her Card has a definite limit, fixed expiry date, no chance for renewal and absolutely no Grace period.

      Look at how hard TEMPTRESS has to work just to KEEP her card, which is subject to cancellation, revocation and exhorbitant penalties for any or no reason. AND, she had to deed over everything she had or ever will have just to APPLY for it , with no guarantee it would even be issued.

      Now, take a look at your Card: No fine print, no expiry date, no penalties or interest and — GET THIS! — no payments ! Your Card is totally and completely Pre-Paid. All you had to do was Apply and Acceptance was guaranteed, right?

      Yeah. I think you made the right decision by not changing Cards.

      —JMJ

  15. iteration iteration iteration Says:

    ugghh! i hate the doctors office, and i will never go. you can’t make me! seriously, i’d rather die than get a checkup. they’re so emasculating! unless my priority’s change and i find myself with mouths to feed, i will NEVER go the doctor. dentist? okay, no problem. i’ll go the dentist any day. very cunning of you jmj and mazsamen, prying a weakness out me! oh well, everyone fears something!

    • Mr. i-i-i,

      You realize that NOW you sound like a speech impediment, right?

      Anyhow, I think I’ve gotten to know you well enough to say with confidence that you are level-headed, funny, confident, probably make a good friend and are a hoot to have around. What surprises me though, is the fact that I didn’t pick up on your being a scaredy-cat.

      Emasculating? Yeah and so is having a mechanic check your transmission, right?

      Death before doctors? Sounds like the motto on a flag flying half-mast at a cemetery run by the Marx Brothers. You’re single, right? Don’t you know that the ratio of female-to-male doctors is rising? And they make a pretty decent buck!

      <>
      So, Mr. I’ll-do-the-dentist-but-damn-the-doctor, here’s the plan:
      You find a gorgeous female doctor, let her check you out thoroughly, marry her (No pre-nup, okay.), learn to make quiche and tiramisu, keep that youthful + buff thing going, flash that fresh-from-the-dentist smile like you’re running for office and she’ll be tickled to examine you on a regular and most thorough basis. No more doctor’s office for you!

      Did I mentions that M.D.s make a decent living? Play your cards right and, besides the checkup you need, you’ll get that red sports car sooner rather than later. An added bonus is that when it’s time for her to bring your Little i-i-i’s into the world, you won’t have to put unnecessary mileage on that car rushing her to the hospital. Just have her time the delivery for when she’s at work. Badda-bing, badda-boom! A bouncing Baby i-i-i and you never had to go near a hospital or doctor…. well, maybe just once or twice or so.

      Go to the doctor, Young Man. Mazsamem and I know where you live.

      — JMJ

      • mazsamem Says:

        Gotta love the baby! Will you ever stop making me snicker, chuckle…OK…downright laugh? Better NOT! 🙂

    • mazsamem Says:

      DB isn’t the ONLY one around here who can say: ha ha ha. I know a very attractive CRNP in these parts who might just change your opinion. She can do everything a doctor does except put you in a hospital. Her boss does that. So happens doc is also female…a lady of the Asian persuasion. Come on, i i i, if my 16 year old son can do it…why not my 26 year old e-son? 😉 Sweet dreams!

  16. don't panic like the titanic Says:

    okay, if its clear that i’m mortally wounded or i have parts falling off you got a deal.

    regards, your bull-headed e friend to the end. the very end.

  17. don't panic like the titanic Says:

    jmj, don’t you have the very same (and very male) tendency to avoid appearing vulnerable? back me up! i don’t mind divulging that info here, as i can always deny it later. but as far as telling a wife or girlfriend? no way jack! wild horses couldn’t drag that nugget of info from me! you see jmj and mazsamen, im a dab old hand at misdirection, sleight of hand, and generally misleading people. even ones i love (yuck!) it would take her years, maybe decades to realize my pitiful fear (i prefer distaste) of the doctors office. by the time she did i’d be too old anyway. i dont need no stinkin’ doctors office. I’AM IRON MAN!!

    • Dear Whatchamacallit,
      I know you’re kidding and are jerking our chains just for fun. There is no way you believe some of what you just said.

      — Tendency to avoid appearing vulnerable? I know a Seiko Shihan (7th Degree Blackbelt) in Aikido who carries his cash in his right-front pocket, wrapped with a rubberband. When he and I travel to some not-so-safe places, he actually puts his cash wad in his sock. Let me assure you, Len Tadashi K. is nobody’s wuss but does take prudent precautions.

      Point being, we’re all vulnerable to all sorts of things all the time. All we can do is inform ourselves, be aware, prepare and then ACT APPROPRIATELY to what we sense. It appears that your body is telling you something by its unusual growth. Ignoring that will not make it go away or stop.

      I’m gonna stop now ’cause you’re making me angry. I just met a guy that I find fun to fight and joke with and you’re telling me you are possibly going to deprive me of that pleasure ’cause you don’t want to appear vulnerable!?! If I didn’t know that your spam filter would filter it out, I’d email you a sock in the jaw!

      I’m not e-v-e-n going to get started on the deceiving wife-girlfriend-loved-ones thing, especially not because I think that’s just another “Let’s-jerk-the-chain-and-giggle-at-their-reaction” prank. But, just in case, I refer you to one of our earlier exchanges wherein we agreed that thoughts and words are powerful.

      I once got a call from friend who told me he was about to commit suicide. I believed him. He is a brilliant guy and a master debater… somewhat like you, Man-with-every-name. So, I did not argue with him. I simply told him that, if he killed himself, then I would no longer be his friend. I called the Operator (911 was some years away) jumped in my car and drove the 20+ miles to his apartment and found him safely in the custody of NYPD. Jimmy C. is still alive, unmarried (like you will be with that gf/wife attitude) and more-than-less living a satisfying life.

      Now, I am sincerely telling You: Check it out or I cannot be your eFriend. I’m too vulnerable and wussy to standby and watch someone I care about (potentially) do himself harm.

      — JMJ

      • batman is the coolest Says:

        i’m perfectly healthy! i’ve never been the masochistic type (i’m not sadistic either). guess i’ll be joining you in the “occasionally makes semi-serious sexist remarks corner of shame”, but i must defend my decision to omit (not a lie if you “omit” it) certain bits of information from the women in my life. surely you are aware of “nagging”. women are quite adept at this. i wish to avoid being nagged to death, lest i find myself keeping devilbloggger and temptress company earlier than intended. you don’t have to be my eFriend if i upset you. you can be my eQuantance*. *I think i spelled it wrong and spellchecker won’t help me. damn!

  18. Mr. Too Many Names to Count, thank you for revealing your honest flaw… I am taking notes…😉

    • pet of temptress Says:

      take them while you can, beloved temptress. soon they will be irrelevant. i’ve been taking notes too, as your arrival warrants my undivided attention. i NEVER question providence…

    • man of action Says:

      flaw? hmm. lets change the wording. fear will be reffered to as “caution”. flaw will be reffered to as a “minor setback”. from where i stand, (its a very long way down. ALL the way down) this is a fixable issue. wanna wager?

      p.s. no one seems very fond of my name changing. suggest a name to me temptress, and if it pleases me, i’ll keep it.

  19. Excuse me, everyone… all these blog posting is starting to become frighteningly humorous. Humor makes people laugh, and then joyful, and then there’s unity… AAACCCCKKK!!!!! This must stop and become depressing again. I am now going to go read about our beelzebud president and feel consoled again.

    • pet of temptress Says:

      no more humor? but i was gonna dust off my “two demons and a priest walk into a bar” joke! christians would have you believe all demons don’t enjoy humor. this is a falsehood, and i take exception to that! really ruffles my petticoats! you’ve only been led to believe you don’t enjoy humor. the banality of evil demands you have a chuckle every now and then, watch fox news for a bit. the “temptation” to laugh will dominate you.

      • When you get this, you’re gonna laaaaaaaaaaugh…

        Two demons walk into a bar. One says to the other, “You didn’t see it either?”

        • shalimamma Says:

          LOVE it!!!!!

        • mazsamem Says:

          PDST~can you enlighten me? In other words…I don’t get it. I remain, Racking My Brain… Maybe I haven’t “evolved” enough? hehehe 😉

        • No worries, mazsamem. I got us matching helmets and reserved two side-by-side seats on the “Little Yellow Bus”, ’cause I don’t get it either!

        • My favorite humor involves ambiguity and conflation, it seems. Here, you have to get away from what you were expecting with the word “bar”. They don’t walk into a *bar*, they walk into a BAR. More later. (snicker)

        • OK…it took me a long time to get it myself.

          Picture a railing outdoors. Like a fence. Metal bars. Now, wait for two guys to walk into it and say, “Oops, I walked into this bar”.

        • Holy cow, Piltdown Superman!

          T-H-A-T was really your comedy bit? Please stick to your scientific pursuits and leave the ha-ha’s to those whose funnybones are more evolved.

          Sheesh! And I was starting to like the guy….

        • JMJ, my excuse would be pleasing to DB: I stole that joke. How about this one? Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, “Why the long face?”

        • Okay, Piltdown Superman, that IS better than the first. How could it not be? Still, I personally prefer your sharing things like today’s article, “Contradictions”, rather than your humor.

          Careful, though! Articles like that may cause some men to rethink the often unfair and unequal status to which women universally have been relegated throughout history. Heck! It might even cause many men to reassume their roles as First-among-Equals in family affairs.

          ….more stable nurturing families, fewer young folk driven by domestic discord into maladaptive behaviors…. Not a good thing ’round here! Just imagine all the divorce attorneys, pediatric shrinks and therapists, suicide-prevention workers, truant officers, juvenile detention center staff, family court personnel, bar owners, brothel owners, porn site registrars/registrants, etc., etc., ad nauseum, who would become unneeded and unemployed if your re-examining comfortable, time-worn attitudes results in society’s basic building block becoming more sound!

          You know how that will fly with you-know-who and his favorite flaming femme fatale. So, watch your back!

          Gotta go. I’m going to re-re-watch “A Day at the Races”.

          Thanks, Piltdown Superman. At least your horse joke REMINDED me of something funny.

          —JMJ

        • batman is the coolest Says:

          i get it. i love bad jokes! very funny.bad jokes, bad puns, and especially bad movies. troll 2, anyone? sleepaway camp? i know, rock and roll nightmare! the ultimate trifecta of “so bad they’re good” movies.

    • shalimamma Says:

      Temptress, it is quite obvious that you need spellcheck, or at least a 5th grade knowledge of how to put together a sentence. THAT is making me laugh! 😉

    • TEMPTRESS 👿 , at the risk of incurring your wratful attention, please take this the wrong way:

      Even tho’ you answer to a lower authority, when you speak of the duly elected President of the United States, you still should show proper respect. For example, “beelzebud president” should be more respectfully written as “Beelzebud President”.

      Try reading Emily Postnewage and learn some etiquette! Nobody likes a rude demon.

      — Wasn’t Me

  20. mazsamem Says:

    Marina…knock knock. 🙂 We haven’t heard from you lately. Are you still stopping by here? Hope to see something from you soon. This ole mother hen is wondering why she’s heard not a peep from you. Missing you, marina!

  21. All i really want is to join the gat damn thing i’m willing to. Any1 who can offer his or her help contack me on 0731672752

  22. La Quester Says:

    WOLF=as in big bad? 1’m not gonna contack ya. why does it say pee.com when 1 click ur name? u one a them?

  23. Quality content is the important to be a focus for the visitors to
    go to see the web site, that’s what this web page is providing.

  24. I really love your site.. Very nice colors & theme.
    Did you develop this site yourself? Please reply back as I’m planning to create my very own website and would like to know where you got this from or just what the theme is named. Appreciate it!

  25. Jesus Jones Says:

    Its too bad that the socalled sexual harassment law is unapologetically kept in effect for naught. We dont need demonic,evil,etc. laws like that in effect. Jailing and casting men out like Satan himself from stores,malls,etc. over something as trivial as saying your breasts are beautiful or your dress is pretty. Thats what disgraces women are today.

  26. I want in…..to fallow nd get rich

    if it rily works

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